What to Get Your Love for Valentine’s Day

Picture of a store front with sticky notes in the shape of a heart probably on Valentine's Day

Photo by Mockaroon on Unsplash

What to Get Your Partner for Valentine’s Day

How about you try it this way this year

Valentine’s day is coming up again. One part of the population goes “Yaaay” and the other just hopes for it to blow over quickly. It’s the same thing every year. People are rushing to the stores to buy an uninspired present last minute.

If that sounds like you and you are trying to come up with something to get your partner for Valentine’s Day, let me suggest something for the coming week:

How about this year, you just buy nothing.

Buying stuff on Valentine’s Day means that you don’t care about your partner

I can hear thousands of people around the world cry out in disgust. “ He’s probably single and has nobody to love. How else could he suggest such a thing?“

I can. And I will. Because giving somebody a present on Valentine’s day is probably the easiest way to show your partner that you don’t care about him or her. Why?

Let me ask you one question here:

Does anybody, in all seriousness, believe that it’s an honest gesture of love to gift someone a present if the reason you buy it is that everybody else does?

Buying something on Valentine’s day is like saying: “Thank god we have a specific day of the year on which the news reminds me that it’s time to show my partner I love her/him because otherwise, I would forget”.

It reminds me of our mothers, making us apologize to somebody when we had behaved badly when we were kids. We’d walk up to them, hands in our pockets, and mumble something like “I’m very, very sorry for what I did.” while our mothers stood with crossed arms behind us.

It’s the very same thing on Valentine’s day. It’s like society stands crossed-armed behind us while we hold out the present we bought last minute that was wrapped by the shop employee while we mumble something like “I’m very, very much in love with you.”

There’s a much better way to show your partner that you love them but most people just opt for the easy way and buy some meaningless present.

According to a survey by the National Retails Federation this year — once again — people have record Valentine’s day spending plans.

Graph showing the annual total expected spending on Valentine's Day in the U.S.
Source: https://nrf.com/media-center/press-releases/confident-consumers-and-broader-buying-lead-record-valentines-day

The total expected spending in the U.S. this year is 27.4B dollars.
That’s 27,400,000,000$. Holy cow.

It’s like the economy is just trying to find another day of the year to get people to buy stuff by suggesting that you are a bad partner if you *don’t* do it.

Sneaky little trick but damn, does it work.

The average expected spending *per person* comes in at 196,31$. Don’t you think we’re starting to go a little crazy here?

It’s the same with Christmas and any other holiday.

The actual reason for the holiday is forgotten and we’re more and more turning every single day of the year into a reason to buy stuff. Just under a different theme.

Does anybody even know what Valentine’s Day is truly about? I didn’t. But I looked it up for you:

The thing is that it’s even unclear precisely who we’re talking about as there are three different Saint Valentine. One legend says that Saint Valentine was a priest who continued to marry young men and women after Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than married ones with families.

Another story is about an imprisoned Valentine who fell in love with the blind daughter of his judge, who’s eyesight he restored. Shortly before he was executed he sent a letter to his love and signed it with “Your Valentine”.

The more you know…

Romantic as this may sound. What in the world does that have to do with buying expensive presents for your partner?

So if you think your partner will be disappointed if he or she doesn’t get a present on this year’s V-Day, why don’t you just give them this article to read instead and tell them that you are not buying anything on Valentine’s Day because you love them?

What to do instead

So if you want to show your partner that you love them, why don’t you try it this way this year:

Pick any other date of the year. Seriously, any other date (except for maybe your loved one’s birthday and Christmas), and just give them a present to show them that you love them then.

It’s much more of a statement of care and love when you give them a present they did not expect than buying them something expensive because everybody else is doing it.

A single handpicked flower that you bring home on any other day of the year says “I love you!” so much more than an expensive ring that you bought on Valentine’s day. And it costs you nothing but a thought.

But that’s the problem. Most people don’t spend a minute’s thought on how they could show their partner they love them. So they just do what everybody else does: Spend money on Valentine’s day instead.

I never bought my girlfriend anything on Valentine’s day. I stay the heck away from it and don’t touch it with a ten-foot pole. And so does she.

I don’t need to give her a present on a specific day of the year to remind her that I love her. I show it to her the other 364 days of the year. She knows it and a present that is bought because society tells me to doesn’t seem like much of a gesture at all, does it?

She gets a bunch of flowers randomly during the year. She gets a note saying “I love you, have a wonderful day!” in her bag to find it during work.

And she does the same for me. Ok, maybe not the flowers. I’m not the biggest fan of those. But it’s the little things that show your partner that you appreciate them and tell them what they mean to you.

Not buying the most expensive thing you can find on a specific day of the year when everybody else does.

Anti-Valentine’s Day

So how do we spend Valentine’s Day?

We usually just grab a beer, order some pizza and watch an action movie together. As anti-romantic as possible. Not this year, because this year we’ll be getting us some of that lovely Coronavirus, traveling to Southeast Asia.

But that’s what Valentine’s Day is for us, each year. A reminder that we don’t need reminding that we love each other.

So I invite you to join us. Celebrate #AntiValentinesDay with your partner to show them that you love them, no matter what day of the year it is.

Roses are red 
Violets are blue
We’re skipping Valentine’s day
And you should too

Thanks for reading, have a wonderful day.


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